A Brief History Of Me - My 15th Birthday

March 15, 2010

Dear Baby,

Today is my 15th birthday (also my golden birthday)! I should be throwing an awesome, elaborate party like I do every year, but I haven't been as close to my old friends lately as I used to. We have kind of drifted apart since we started high school, so I figure why waste money on an over the top party for people who don't even talk to me enough to know that I am currently 3 months pregnant...

That's right, 3 months already! You can't tell though, I am thin as ever. Here's what is going on with you this week: "The most dramatic development this week: reflexes. Your baby's fingers will soon begin to open and close, his toes will curl, his eye muscles will clench, and his mouth will make sucking movements. In fact, if you prod your abdomen, your baby will squirm in response, although you won't be able to feel it. His intestines, which have grown so fast that they protrude into the umbilical cord, will start to move into his abdominal cavity about now, and his kidneys will begin excreting urine into his bladder. Meanwhile, nerve cells are multiplying rapidly, and in your baby's brain, synapses are forming furiously. His face looks unquestionably human: His eyes have moved from the sides to the front of his head, and his ears are right where they should be. From crown to rump, your baby-to-be is just over 2 inches long (about the size of a lime) and weighs half an ounce."

Like I said, I didn't have a birthday party this year. In fact, not many of my old friends even said "happy birthday" to me today... at least Cassidy didn't. I think that hurts me more than anything because we have been best friends since we were 6 years old!

I won't tell a lie, high school has been extremely hard for me, it seems that nothing goes my way. I made the drill team, but between you and me, that wasn't much of a feat because they have been pretty sucky the past year or two. (Part of me wonders if that is part of the reason that Cass and I aren't as close, but I know it's because some parents of girls in my grade dislike me, and Cass being as nice as she is doesn't want to upset anyone.) Once summer was over and freshman year started, most of my old friends distance themselves from me because of some petty summer drama. Therefore, I'm left with my drill girls. Since most of them are juniors this year, I have been hanging out more with the older crowd. (I have always gotten along better with people in the grades above me though due to my maturity level.) I went to Homecoming with a junior, and that's where I met your daddy! A few months later I was pregnant and only halfway through my freshman year...

Daddy and I have decided we are still going to keep you a secret for a while. Why should I tell my darkest secret to people who don't care about me? You mean too much to me, why start drama over something as beautiful as a new life? I love you my little baby!

Love,
Mommy